Another Stupid Circle A Kingdom Hearts and Dresden Files Crossover
by DoubleONein
Summary: Someone is setting circle traps that Saix obliviously keeps falling into. Who is behind this madness, and why?


Another. Stupid. Circle! a Dresden Files and Kingdom Hearts Crossover

It all began about a month ago, the day Saix woke up and discovered his divination crystal missing. He stormed downstairs, true to Berserker form, and shouted, "where the hell is my crystal!?" as he went. "Probably up your ass and to the left," Xaldin replied. "Now sit down and eat your breakfast." Now, Xaldin is a pretty good cook, and nobody ever says no to one of his meals, so it really said something about how upset Saix was about his missing crystal when he ignored it, turned around and walked away. "Go look online. Xigbar's probably put it on EBay or something. You know how he's been lately, selling everything we own online," Axel supplied. "Fine," Saix said, venturing into the living room where the communal computer resided.

"Dammit!" Saix thundered twenty minutes later; "the whole damned internet is full of crystals for sale, and they all. Look. Like Mine!" "Uh-oh," Roxas said apprehensively from the next room, and for good reason, because Saix was angry. So angry in fact, that his claymore had made an appearance. That's when he had a moment of insight, which is not a very common occurrence for someone like him who is always so damn angry that he can't think straight. "All right then. I know what I'm going to do do. I'm calling that wizard in the phone book! You know, what's-his-name. Breslin or Dresden or something like that." "You do that!" Roxas said. "Anything to keep you from getting angry, because you're freaking scary when you're angry."

Meanwhile across the city, professional wizard and private eye Harry Dresden was having a slow and boring day. In fact, the only things he had done all day that could even remotely be called useful were use a tracking spell to find his car keys and go to the bathroom. "I'm bored. Bored as hell," he said to no one in particular, and that's when the phone rang. "Dresden," he said upon answering. "Mr. Dresden, this is Saix Moon calling. My divination crystal appears to have gone missing. I've looked all over the house to no avail, and I don't know what else to do. I just bought the thing and it was expensive as hell." "I charge $50 an hour, so for a basic tracking spell such as the one I plan to use, your estimate will be $50. What time do you want to meet?" "As soon as possible!" Saix replied vehemently. "This damn thing is important to me!" "All right then Mr. Moon. I'll be by at around noon," Dresden said, hung up the phone and prepared for what he hoped would be one of his simpler cases.

An hour later, Demyx answered the door to find a tall, imposing figure on the doorstep. "Giant! AAAAAAAAAh!" "Demyx, you're an idiot. That's the wizard I hired to find my crystal," Saix said upon coming in to the room after hearing the commotion. "Sorry I scared you sir," Dresden said, "now Mr. Moon, may I come in?" "Go ahead," Saix said, and as soon as Dresden was inside, he said. "Now let's find this thing!" "Do you have a piece of it somewhere?" Dresden asked. "I need it for the tracking spell." "Yeah. It's in a little bag in my room. Let me go get it." Saix ran upstairs and returned two minutes later with a little piece of obsidian in a zip lock bag. "This should do," Dresden said, took a piece of chalk from his pocket and drew a circle on the ground. "What is he doing?" Demyx asked. "It's a tracking spell," Marluxia replied. It's most commonly used to find missing items." "Cool!" Demyx said, got bored and then walked away. Meanwhile, Dresden had taped the piece of crystal on the back of a compass, uttered a spell and broken the circle, releasing the spell. The compass lead him and Saix upstairs, down the hall and in to Xigbar's room where said slime ball was just about to post an ad for it online. "That's my crystal!" Saix shouted, looming over Xigbar. "Give it back Now!" "All right, fine," Xigbar replied, the tone of boredom showing an obvious presence, handing over the object in question. "Thank you! Now don't ever touch this thing again, or all shall be lost to you!" Saix thundered and stormed out the door.

As Saix was showing Dresden to the door, he said, "thank you very much for finding my crystal! I'll be right back with your payment." He went upstairs and returned five minutes later with a $50 bill that he'd stolen from Marluxia's room. What he couldn't have known, however was that he had just picked up a counterfeit bill because Marluxia had a wallet full of them in plain view in case of a situation like this in order to protect the real thing. Saix handed over the money; sure he had gotten away with his dastardly deed.

That's why the next day, he was surprised when he got a call from Dresden stating that he had tried to deposit the bill, but the bank had deemed it counterfeit. "Oh my goodness, I am so sorry. I'll pay you correctly within the next week or so," Saix replied. "No problem. Just get me the money as soon as you can." At that point, Dresden made it a habit to check the mail as soon as he was sure it had ran for the day in order to ensure that his money wouldn't be stolen, and each day he checked, it wasn't there. A week went by, then two, then three, then a whole month. Dresden was at his wit's end.

That's when he realized that his best friend Amber was coming in to town for the National Psychics' Convention, so he decided to give her a call and get her advice. She got the call just as she was disembarking from the arduous 5 hour flight from Alabama. "Hey Harry, what's up?" she asked upon answering. "I am at my wit's end. I've got this client who owes me 50 bucks for this job I did for him about a month ago. I tracked a crystal to his roommate who had stolen it from him and was about to sell it online," Dresden said. "This sounds like a familiar problem. Who was the client?" she asked. "Saix Moon. This guy who lives in a house full of about 13 other people." "Oh. I know this guy. My friend Jen lives in that same house with her husband Sexton, and they tell me that this kind of thing has been going on for a while now," Amber said sagely. "Oh really?" Dresden asked. "Yeah. Everybody has had something go missing at some point or the other." "So… what the hell do I do about my late money?" A smile crossed Amber's face. She had an idea. "I have an idea. Follow Saix, and everywhere he goes, set a circle trap for him, and make it so that when he steps in to it, it snaps shut around him, and he can't go anywhere until it's broken." The idea was so outrageously funny that they both started laughing, and that very same day, Dresden went to work on Operation Stupid Circle!

It was lunchtime, and Saix was running some errands around town when he decided to stop at a 7/11 for a sandwich. He decided to buy some chips and obliviously stepped inside a ring of those metal shelf things where some bags of chips were located. That's when pop! the circle of protective, or in this case imprisoning energies closed around him. He didn't notice this until he tried to carry his merchandise to the counter and hit an invisible wall. He stormed, "what the hell is going on here!?" He proceeded to kick and hit the invisible wall, and that having no effect made him even angrier than he already was. It made him so angry, in fact that he went berserk and tried using his claymore to break the circle. Of course, nobody in the store had a clue what on the green Earth was going on. All they saw was this crazy guy kicking, hitting and slashing at the air. The cashier saw a faint line of chalk on the ground, and figuring that the guy was having a Great Wall of China hallucination or something, wiped out the line with his foot. "All right now, sir. The evil line of chalk is gone. Now will you please get the hell out of my store?" he asked, with a bemused look on his face. "Fine," Saix replied as he stalked out the door, feeling like an idiot and completely embarrassed, forgetting his merchandise as he went.

Because of this, Saix stopped at the nearest McDonalds, figuring that what had just happened probably was all in his head, or that it was just a coincidence. He failed to notice that he was sitting within a ring of tables, and just like at 7/11, the signature _Pop of a closing circle escaped his notice, that was, until he was finished eating and stood up to leave. "Again!" he shouted. "Another circle? Really?" His ranting did not escape the notice of Jen and Sexton one table over. Jen stood up, scuffed out the nearly invisible line of chalk with her foot and said, "You're an idiot." Again, feeling embarrassed, Saix left the restaurant without a word._

_By the time the next day rolled around, Saix was doing everything in his power to forget about the circle kerfuffle, and he figured that the best way to do so would be to take a trip to Wal-Mart. There was this bookshelf he had been meaning to buy, and today, they were on sale for 50% off! He entered the store and proceeded to the office supply section where a ring of shelves awaited him, including the one he wanted right on the inside. He stepped in to the ring to get a better look, and _Pop!_ The invisible circle closed again. Yet again, he didn't notice until he was ready to leave. "Dammit!" he shouted. "Not. Again!" Just like yesterday, he started hitting and kicking the invisible wall, the only difference being that this time, he had some success. Gradually at first, then a little more with each blow, the circle began to crack. Saix finally got impatient, produced his claymore, slammed it in to the ground and the darn thing disintegrated! Dresden was two aisles over when this happened, and through a pair of binoculars, saw the whole thing. He calmly walked over to Saix and said, "Mr. Moon, this will keep up until you pay me." "All right, fine," Saix relented. "I'll get you the money tonight." "All right," Dresden said cautiously as he turned and walked away._

_When he got home, Saix snuck up to Marluxia's room, found the real wallet and nabbed a fifty. He then called up Dresden who came over within ten minutes to collect. "Jeez. Was it really that hard? You could've avoided this whole circle business if you had just done this a month ago!" "Yeah. You're right," Saix said, as Marluxia snuck up behind him and shouted, "You stole my last fifty bucks! Die!" His scythe appeared, but not before Saix said, "do you really want to fight me? I mean, we're practically equals." "No," Marluxia replied, "But I've always wanted to do this," and grinning evilly, he produced a circle of flowers, effectively trapping Saix in a space only three feet wide. "Dammit!" Saix shouted in frustration._

_The end._


End file.
